Friendships

Today, I met a girl we went to school together five years ago, she was with another one we studied together in primary eight years ago. I recognized them and they recognized me, but that’s where it ended. If we had tried to talk to each other it would have been some shushed awkward small talk.

This made me wonder what makes friendships last. What keeps the light going. And this is something I can only speculate about as I have no super long term friendships. By super long friendships I mean those that last more then five years. The friends I had then we’re either estranged or I follow them on social media or we have small talks every other year.

In the past years I have learned a bit of what makes friendships stronger. One, it is to has to be a two way friendship, if both parties are not interested in making it last then it will dwindle into nothingness.

The second and most important thing I learned is to give space your friends. Nobody wants a clingy friend no matter how good they are. We have to acknowledge that our friends have friends and that they need to give them time too. So whoever much we need them all the time we have to let them go once in a while so that they can tend to their other friends.

I consider myself a good friend, but sometimes I feel guilty of not being much of help. Sometimes it seems I’m getting so much and giving so little. However, I try to suppress the guilt because I assume they do it willingly and that one day I’ll get a chance to be of help.

Despite being a good friend, I have trouble making friends. I have been studying at a university for almost three months and I only have two friends and six acquaintances. I don’t know how to attract people, to make them know that I could be a good friend and that I need them as friends. However this is something I’ll have to learn to live with unless there is something I can do to change it.