uMwizerwa wa Ngoboka

I was a tangled mess Yet you came to me. I couldn't stand my reflection, Yet you saw me. I lived in the darkness, but you were my light. I was in deep despair, You were my lifeline. I was crawling towards depression, You were my joie de vivre. When I broke down, You picked up the pieces And glued them together. I owe my life to you.

I closed my eyes, willing whoever was knocking away. I had spent so many days locked in my room. I wished the world away and ruminated over and over again about my place in anyone's life. To me, it seemed like my parents had done a great disservice by giving birth to me. I could not see my place in the world, let alone  MIT. However, I could not see myself going back home either, so I was in Limbo without belonging anywhere at all. To keep the illusion going, I avoided daylight like the plague. I so badly wanted to believe that I could exist separate from the world, and the darkness of the night helped through this. That is why, I half heard the knocks despite the fact that it was really loud. I was in a slumber, half asleep. It stopped for a while, and I thought I had duped them. In reality they were giving me time to respond and I did not. Hearing the click of the door opening sent a wave of anxiety through my being. There was nowhere to hide anymore. MIT police ...

Today, I found a fortune cookie in my lounge. I decided to venture out and see what it says. Opening the cookie, I expected something cheezy and probably extremely random. Something like Half and half makes one. Instead, the note said, " No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted" Below is an ode to the people who randomly, spontaneously did kind stuff for me. I won't name names because I do not know most of these people 1. In the fall semester, I was sitting in front of W20, the student center, and a man I did not know offered me a beautiful real pink rose and wished me a good day 2. I was walking along the infinite with my phone's torch on, and a lady told me that it was on. 3. I left my phone in class and my TA collected it and emailed me. The phone had a wallet on the back with my student I.D and debit card 4. After the fall fashion, I was carrying a bagful of clothes. My dorm is really far, and I had trouble carrying it all the way. A lady offered to...

I was baptized as a baby, on the first of January 2000. I can say that it was new millenia, century, year, month, week, day and me. There has been a lot of controversy around baptizing babies, as they don’t get a chance to decide whether or not they actually want to. I was born and raised in the catholic church. I received all the primary sacraments- Baptism, Communion, Confession, and Confirmation. I never felt trapped into the faith, despite the flaws of the religion - I believe all religions do have some- I was attached to it. I used to joke that I was born and vaccinated with the catholic faith. As I grew up, and experienced different stages of my growth, my faith fluctuated and sometimes it left me confused. The first three years of highschool were spent in a catholic school. Here, my faith was never challenged. However, it had no room to grow. I found myself doing things out of obligation and routine. Things changed when I started Advanced level high school. The schoo...

A beautiful smile A far off melody A good conversation Words of wisdom Friendship found In the most unexpected place. For a life time, I will rememberThe nights I spent Within your company

For a week I sat, Not knowing where I stood. For the fire within, not kindled, had died

I tell you that I am fine I tell you that I am getting better Like a robot, a recording I say what I feel I need to say I say I am glad I am getting the help I say I will work it out Like a robot, a recording But deep inside I do not really know. Am I happy or sad? Can I be happy? Do I deserve to be? Do I need to be? What happens next? Fight or Flight?