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Affichage des articles du janvier, 2019

Success

Success is defined as accomplishment of an aim or purpose. So successful people are those who accomplish what they aim for. What happens after we succeed we don’t tell. What happened before succeeding we don’t say. There are a humongous number of self help books about how to be successful, this won’t be about it. This is about what it means to succeed, how it feels. what we do with it and what happens when we lose it. For most of my life, I considered myself successful. I focused on what I knew I was good at and put in all my effort. What I was good at was academics. I was first in class most of the time, and I ended up being valedictorian in high school. However focusing on what I was good at, I forgot there was more in life like having friends, doing fun things, indulging in guilty pleasures and more. So the moment I ended being the best academically I had nothing else to act as a buffer. I fell and fell hard. This ain’t a pity story though, it’s all part of reflections....

Do I hate my body?

My body and I have a weird relationship. I tried to love it, but it did not love me back. In my tender age, it had the appearance and size of that of a grown woman. And I loathed it. Just recently, as I was complaining about body shaming, a friend of mine hinted that I might have self hate. He was not completely wrong. In high school, we used to play a game, one would name 3 body parts they loved the most. I could only name one- my nails. It is very easy to hate the voluptuousness of my figure. To look in the mirror and see the 36 inch waist, the 52 inch hips, the 5ft2 height that coupled with weight makes my BMI way off. However, I would be ignoring the joy I find in watching my shadow. The beauty of my lips layered with black lipstick. The sexiness of my bosom. The dark and uniqueness of my nails. If I focus on what's wrong with me, I will be driven to loathe the one thing I am stuck with, the one thing layered with so many beautiful things It would be so easy...