Dear class of 2021,
A few months ago, we individually received letters that would change the course of the next four years of our lives and even more- letters of admission to colleges and Universities. Subsequently, a kindred soul decided to create this group- a WhatsApp group. It was to be the birth of a new community, new friendships and relationships.
I was added in the first round, introductions were made, jokes were cracked, etc. I, with my eternal apprehension to large groups of people- even virtual ones, kept quiet. I told myself I would do the intro tomorrow, until It was no longer something I aspired to do. So I resigned myself to being a "lurker".
I learned to know a number of you, your perks and quirks, your style and so much more. Selfishly, I never gave any part of me. A number of you may know me as the "MIT" girl, and others, we spent three years of highschool together, yet some completely ignore my existence, but it's no big deal- I didn't know me either.
Lately, I thought I had reached a breakthrough. I was more self-understood, and it was a time people thought I had lost it- better yet that I was crazy. Nevertheless, this was the period I was happy, carefree and optimistic. Had you known me then, I guess I would have been less reluctant to share parts of myself.
That period came and went. I retransitioned to the passive Diane of the past. Coupled with home responsibilities, I found myself closing up a little bit more. The conversations I had with people turned into small talk, and I never left home unless I absolutely had to. I barely left my bed.
When it come to online group interactions, I was a shadow- lurking in the background. I almost considered leaving some of the groups. However I kept in mind that the Class of 2021 would be a family away from home when I flew off to college. So I swallowed my fears and remained there lurking.
I have always loved mentoring, so when the 2021 fellowship was announced I was elated. However, it seemed messed up in so many ways. I spent a lot of time analysing it, trying to find its flaws and strengths. I wanted to join so badly, but it still felt wrong and I didn't.
A few days before it started, I was approached by several people asking me to mentor in ACT. I accepted on the spot. It was a chance to get out of the house-sitting, for I had gotten tired of staying at home everytime. In addition, I wanted to make a debut in the class of 2021 entourage.
I found my second breakthrough in the fellowship. There were so many amazing people. They taught me how to love people again. I found people who turned out to be very good friends. I also met again with people I had missed, and I got to see them in a better light.
I was ready to learn. Learn to be me, to let people know the true me. I started giving little portions of who I was. Some people failed to understand who I had turned into. Sometimes I question my actions, for they do not reflect the person I thought I was. However, I love the new me; and I am ready to keep on creating her.
With love,
Mwizerwa Diane
June 1st, 2017
A few months ago, we individually received letters that would change the course of the next four years of our lives and even more- letters of admission to colleges and Universities. Subsequently, a kindred soul decided to create this group- a WhatsApp group. It was to be the birth of a new community, new friendships and relationships.
I was added in the first round, introductions were made, jokes were cracked, etc. I, with my eternal apprehension to large groups of people- even virtual ones, kept quiet. I told myself I would do the intro tomorrow, until It was no longer something I aspired to do. So I resigned myself to being a "lurker".
I learned to know a number of you, your perks and quirks, your style and so much more. Selfishly, I never gave any part of me. A number of you may know me as the "MIT" girl, and others, we spent three years of highschool together, yet some completely ignore my existence, but it's no big deal- I didn't know me either.
Lately, I thought I had reached a breakthrough. I was more self-understood, and it was a time people thought I had lost it- better yet that I was crazy. Nevertheless, this was the period I was happy, carefree and optimistic. Had you known me then, I guess I would have been less reluctant to share parts of myself.
That period came and went. I retransitioned to the passive Diane of the past. Coupled with home responsibilities, I found myself closing up a little bit more. The conversations I had with people turned into small talk, and I never left home unless I absolutely had to. I barely left my bed.
When it come to online group interactions, I was a shadow- lurking in the background. I almost considered leaving some of the groups. However I kept in mind that the Class of 2021 would be a family away from home when I flew off to college. So I swallowed my fears and remained there lurking.
I have always loved mentoring, so when the 2021 fellowship was announced I was elated. However, it seemed messed up in so many ways. I spent a lot of time analysing it, trying to find its flaws and strengths. I wanted to join so badly, but it still felt wrong and I didn't.
A few days before it started, I was approached by several people asking me to mentor in ACT. I accepted on the spot. It was a chance to get out of the house-sitting, for I had gotten tired of staying at home everytime. In addition, I wanted to make a debut in the class of 2021 entourage.
I found my second breakthrough in the fellowship. There were so many amazing people. They taught me how to love people again. I found people who turned out to be very good friends. I also met again with people I had missed, and I got to see them in a better light.
I was ready to learn. Learn to be me, to let people know the true me. I started giving little portions of who I was. Some people failed to understand who I had turned into. Sometimes I question my actions, for they do not reflect the person I thought I was. However, I love the new me; and I am ready to keep on creating her.
With love,
Mwizerwa Diane
June 1st, 2017
Ce commentaire a été supprimé par l'auteur.
RépondreSupprimerIt is a pleasure to have met you Diane! I can't wait to see what the future holds for us!! Keep it up, amigo!!!
RépondreSupprimer